I am for Mā

from The Mother Poems by Shambhavi Sarasvati at Kindred 108. We're all kindred here.

I saw in my body  
a thousand cities  
crowded with beings caught  
in the wheel of time.  

So I replaced them  
with the sound of Mā,  
and the letters of Mā, and  
Her crystalline mind.

I saw my energy and heart  
traveling here and there,  
trying too hard to tear down  
the fragile homes  
of people’s anger, fear, and doubt.  

So I took refuge in  
Namo nama Shivāya  
and OM.

I saw how I sometimes abandoned my seat  
just to make a way in the world  
with false missions  
fueled by forgetting   
I am Hers alone.

Today I am a leaf in the branches of her tree.  
As She is also the wind,  
I pray only She  
can move me.

Today I am sitting  
at the base of her throne,  
Her foot on my crown,  
and I pray only she can still me.

Now whatever I do or don't do  
in this crowded place, I ask  
to always remember  
I am for Mā.

from The Mother Poems by Shambhavi Sarasvati